Month: October 2011

Shady Jokes

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Shady Jokes

Son: Dad, I’m Thirsty
Dad: Hi, Thirsty. I’m Dad
Son: Dad, I’m not Joking
Dad: I know you are not Joking. You told me that you are Thirsty
Son: You are insane.
Dad: Ofcourse not. I’m not Insane, I’m Dad.

Dear Maths,

You told me to find your X. I tried but I just could not find her. I think she’s moved on. So should you, dude. Please stop telling young kids to find your X.

Regards,

Me

My Lousy poems – the inside story

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My Lousy poems – the inside story

This is another lousy poem that I’ve written
But why rajat why?, you ask. have you gone mad? are you smitten?
Has a girl taken your heart and corrupted your brain
And forced you to become a sha(dy ka)yar with no future gain
Or has the work made you nuts and totally insane
With sales and clients asking you to “do the need full” as if it’s all a child’s game
Well it’s none of the above I think and it’s just internet’s fault
Which allows not so talented folks to copy paste same random stuff without a second thought
So my dearies it’s all your fault and I plead not guilty of any vice
And I shall not accept any brick bats bcoz senti & shady things these days are considered cool and nice
If anyone goes nuts after reading my poems then I am not to blame
Because the survival of the fittest is the rule of this jungle and it’s all a part of the game

don’t worry, fight – shady poem

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Don’t worry, fight

Argue with people, pick a fight
Do what’s necessary to make it all right
God’s given you brains, the nation has given you rights
Let them not force their thoughts upon you
Let them not believe that the might is right
Don’t let the politeness hold you back
Don’t let the society corrupt you from inside
The right to fight should encourage you to
fight for what you believe is right

Shady ra.one poem – no offence meant to srk or his fans

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Shady ra.one poem

Sometimes this is that and that is this
Ram is made ra.one, and heroes are amiss
Everybody wants to be a super hero who’s g.one
No one wants to be ravan, the learned one
But Isn’t it better to have learned enemies
Than a hero who dances at weddings for a few pennies

They say kill ravan and rejoice
But heroes that’re g.one, are they the right choice?
A hero must inspire trust and have brains with brawn
Not one who’s baazigar today and tomorrow he’s g.one

But anyways let’s not get after the poor lad
Let’s now focus our attention to the villain who I hope is real bad
And herein lies the shadiest part, my dearest pal
Coz the person playing ravan is actually “arjun” “ram”pal

So this is really a confusing tale
I hope it doesn’t end up as a mouse’s mouth and elephant’s tale
We hope that jeevan (G1) rocks and is not gone
And inspires us to destroy our inner demons and dance to the chammak challo song

ice-cream’s emotions – shady poem

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Ice-cream’s emotions

You said you love me
But then why did you eat me
So what if I am a yummy chocolate ice-cream
And you’re a cute baby of everybody’s dreams
Why was your love so selfish and cruel
Did I give you satisfaction, was I your fuel?
A day shall come when you’ll also not be around
The god, you think, that loves you so much will ensure that you’re buried in the holy ground

cryptic poems

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First letter in the line crypt –

Poem 1 –

Yellow can be red
Orange can be blue
understanding is a illusion

And knowledge is fluke
Remember sky is orange in mornings
Evenings are at times reddish too

A lie can sometimes be truth

Forget the lessons they taught you
Or the theories you mugged too
Observe the world around you
Learn from life to know the truth

Poem 2 –

Stories end with a lesson each
Idiots may mug up the lessons teachers teach
Genius is mostly ignored and misunderstood
Nincompoops may at times rule the wood
In such times you must be true to yourselves
Not pay any attention to the criticism they yell
Go to your shell and recharge your brain cells
Originality is a talent they can’t buy or sell
Forgive them even if their conduct has been cold and ugly
Finish off by saying – hasta la vista baby

First word in the line crypt

Poem 1 –

I have been trying to inspire a friend to
Write and sing to express himself in joys and sorrows too
Brilliant ideas are after all best expressed in
Poems, rhymes, songs and prose
That portray the true meaning of life’s dazzling highs and ghastly lows
Others may find these masterpieces idiotic or silly or
Fail to understand their hidden depth and meaning
To worry about that should not be a concern, for to
understand great poems, you require a smart audience like my own

shady philosophical poems

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The look

How does it matter how it looks
Whether its text book or facebook
You read them for lessons that mostly you don’t need in life
Or for updates of friends, who you may not necessarily like
The cover of the book may be a bit of an eyesore
But will it stop you from being nerdy and a bore

the need for sasur – damaad serials

the relations between father of the bride and the groom are awkward and unexplained ,
for they haven’t been taught the standard protocol of how to behave,
there is no tele serial to show whether to love or to hate,
they better like the same sport to watch and play,
or they’ll fight over the remote and stage a fight,
the drawing room will echo with their shouts and cause frights,
to gentle ladies whose relationships are crystal clear,
courtesy saas bahu serials that we daily see and hear,
oh! madam kapoor help the chappies out,
make a sasur damaad serial and clear all doubts

The devil called Nerves

Aah the devil called nerves! ,
makes you lose the skills when you need them the most,
makes you jittery, looking stupid like a mouse,
makes you lose your face in front of all who’re around ,
oh my dear fairy confidence, where art thou,
aa kar iss devil ko duur bhagao

One wish only

If god were to grant you one wish, what would you like
would you act all nice and ask god to remove pain from everybody’s life
or would you ask for something expensive, which’ll make your greedy heart smile
or would you act lovey dovey and ask for a sweet heart who would love you all through your life
or would you act smart and ask two wishes to be fulfilled
as first wish ask whatever you like
and for the last wish again ask for 2 wishes, all your life 🙂

Indian cricket’s turnaround

India had been winning too many matches of late;
the victory in the world cup was the cherry on the cake;
but this trip to england has led to too many frowns;
everything that goes up has to one day come down ;
players had been partying and enjoying till late ;
but now they can focus and start from a clean slate;
am sure they will work hard and again play good cricket on the ground ;
and soon everybody will be rejoicing and jumping up and down

Generation Y God

God is becoming like generation y
prefers to watch twenty overs cricket, i wonder why ;
whenever india is winning, he rains;
he has been bribed by brits, i dare say;
but india will not give up i am sure ;
won’t leave british shores without a win i hope

If we were gods and gods were us

If we were gods and gods were us;
we would chill in heaven and drink somras;
while gods would go to work and in the evening catch a bus;
it would be fun to run the world ;
and to see how gods perform the jobs done by us ;
would they still be upright or become corrupt like us ;
and would we treat everyone fairly or favor the god that we love ;
it would surely be fun, it would surely be fun

Sun and Clouds

The sun is shining brightly
it seems to have ended its friendship with clouds presently
sunflowers are happy and grinning; children are running around and sweating
the sun seems to have given the clouds a sack
but the cloud must have reminded the sun – hasta la vista, baby. i’ll be back

Trees and Dogs

Trees and dogs are quite alike
they both save us from dying
one keeps enemies away
and one provides a gas that’s critical for life
and both have a bark which makes them quite alike

If devil was your girlfriend and god was your wife

If devil was your girlfriend and god was your wife;
do you think that you ‘ll have a easy life;
would you like living in heaven, up in the sky;
or would living deep down below, something that you’d like;
wife would always know what you are up to;
and girl friend would give you shady plans and designs;
oh what a tough life, oh what a tough life

What if the sky was earth and earth was sky

What if the sky was earth and earth was sky;
the whole gravity mumbo jumbo was a big fat lie;
birds crawled with flapping wings and men on their feet fly;
the rain fell from earth on the sky;
and the birds purchased umbrellas to remain dry;
fish in the school learnt to sing and write;
children at home played day and night;
and men and women sang, danced and rejoiced;
it will be fun to live in such a world before we died.